With how busy life can get, it’s easy to fall into the “roommate zone” with your spouse, where although you really love each other, there doesn’t seem to be any real connection that upholds your marriage. In this case, the solution is to create shared meaning with your partner, grounded in enriching your inner life…
Read more
I think it’s safe to say that a fairly universal truth is that all couples have irreconcilable differences. From something as small as a mismatch in how loud you like to listen to the TV, to as significant as differing opinions on how to raise children, all couples have at least that one thing that…
Read more
Solve your solvable problems. Sounds pretty intuitive right? Contrarily, John Gottman found that generally, couples often get off track while trying to settle disagreements and end up in screaming matches or blatantly ignoring each other. What could’ve been a productive conversation ends up being a sore spot, including the topic the fight was initially about.…
Read more
For many, the “anything you say, dear” attitude is a sign of weak masculinity and losing power, but John Gottman would disagree. He believes that for a marriage to not only survive, but thrive, the driver’s seat has to be shared. It’s not about fighting for decision-making power, but about looking for ways to give…
Read more
If life were a movie, we might consider the ultimate profession of love to be John Cusack blasting Peter Gabriel’s “In Your Eyes” on his boombox outside Ione Skye’s window, but in reality, it looks more like Carl and Ellie’s 8-minute montage, showing their normal, everyday life together. John Gottman believes that love can be…
Read more
Taking your partner for granted is something of a universal experience. You spend lots of time with this extraordinary person and then over time they start to seem ordinary. Stan Tatkin says that this “boring” feeling comes from our brains doing something very smart: automation of familiar information. If we didn’t, we would never get…
Read more
In any romantic relationship, there may come a time where you begin to doubt. You might doubt yourself, your partner, or your relationship, and this can make a person feel like their whole world is shaking. Needless to say, the breakdown of a romantic relationship can be devastating. Luckily for us, John Gottman, Ph.D. offers…
Read more
