Feelings and Emotions
Last Updated on March 22, 2022 by admin
Feelings and emotions — we all have them. Some are better at dealing with them and even welcome them, while others have no clue what they are and how to deal with them.
What’s the difference between emotions and feelings? An emotion is how your body behaves as you go through different experiences throughout the day. You have a big presentation coming up and your stomach was in knots (emotion) all day. A feeling can follow that emotion. Because of the pressure to do well on the presentation, you feel overwhelmed and easily irritable (feelings). Emotions and feelings play a big part in how you go about your day.
We feel lots of emotions and feelings throughout the day. We may start off the day happy as we sip that first cup of tea/coffee, but then feel upset when we miss the train right before our eyes. Then when a colleague gives us positive feedback on our work, we feel proud and excited. It’s normal to feel lots of different emotions and feelings from one hour to the next.
There are variations in how academics categorize emotions, but generally, it is widely accepted that there are six basic emotions. These are: happiness, surprise, fear, sadness, anger, and disgust.
Feelings affect the way we behave with our family, friends, and colleagues. They are a regular part of our existence and it is important to understand where they come from and how we relate to them. When we have a better understanding of our emotions and feelings, we come to understand ourselves better as well. What sets us off the edge? What can we do to take care of ourselves before we have meltdowns? How do we express ourselves better instead of bottling them up inside? These are important questions worth asking not only for self-care, but also for a healthier, more authentic relationship with those around us.
When asked “How are you feeling?” people generally say words like, “good, bad, happy, sad or angry”. It isn’t just children who have a difficult time describing how they are feeling, but in my experience, adults also have a limited vocabulary and self-awareness about their internal state.
For example, happy can be thankful, pleased, optimistic, alive, loved, and content. Each of these nuanced words tell us a bit more about how we are feeling inside. Similarly, sad can be hopeless, pessimistic, threatened, lonely, devastated, and furious. It’s a great idea to to develop your feelings vocabulary (thanks Google! #feelings #emotions #feelingsvocabulary) and ask yourself “How am I feeling?” as you go about your day. And don’t be surprised if you find yourself feeling happy and sad, simultaneously!
Take a moment to think about how you are feeling right now. And now think about how you felt this morning. And yesterday morning? Do you feel the same way? Different? If so, why? If you noticed some negative emotions, acknowledge them, and accept them without trying to change them. Give yourself permission to feel sad, angry, or afraid. Take a moment trying to understand where they might come from and notice how the emotions may be (have been) impacting your actions and thoughts.
When you are ready, ask yourself if there is anything that you can do to help you honour and process the feelings and emotions. Everyone will have their own way of dealing with them. Some like to “talk it out” with others, cry if they need to, go for a walk, meditate… whatever it is that gives you comfort and peace, consider acting on them.
Feelings and emotions are indications that we are alive and they make us who we are. The more we understand our feelings and emotions, the better we will be able to take care of ourselves and enjoy better relationships with those around us.